Premature ejaculation is the most common concern among men of almost all ages and experts estimate that 1 in 3 men experience early ejaculation of some form or another. The medical community typically designates orgasms that occur within 1 minute of penetration as “officially” premature, but many men feel that even 5 minutes is too soon – and once it’s in your head, it’s pretty much there to stay.
And while there may be some relief knowing that this is an issue for a majority of men, it doesn’t lessen the worry and embarrassment associated with coming too fast, and it certainly doesn’t make searching for a solution any easier. That’s why we’ve compiled four of the top-rated, most-recommended techniques to lasting longer in the bedroom. No prescriptions, no pills, no nasty side effects here; just proven effective solutions recommended by doctors, sex therapists and clinicians on the reg.
1) The Stop-and-Start Technique
This is an exercise best practiced by yourself as you get started because there’s a certain (but reasonable) amount of trial and error involved. The point of stop-and-start is to bring yourself close to orgasm and just as the pressure peaks, edge off (or stop completely) to let the intensity die down. After a few minutes, start back into your regular rhythm and repeat that same routine as many times as you can before “almost, almost ALMOST!” ends in figurative fireworks.
Besides being the ultimate cock tease with a side effect of intense orgasms, starting-and-stopping helps you get familiar with your unique sexual response cycle so you can eventually identify the sensations associated with getting ready to come – and then act accordingly. Whether you need to talk yourself down, think about some kind of sporting event, or count backwards from 100, you’ll have adequate time to react and prevent an early orgasm from ruining the mood.
PRO TIP: Try squeezing the base of your penis and testicles, almost like creating a cock ring with your fingers, as you reach the “stop” portion of the start-and-stop. This slows blood flow to the penis and can help reduce the intensity of your erection and escalation to orgasm.
2) Delay Sprays
Delay sprays, also known as male genital desensitizers, are popular solutions for brief relief from premature ejaculation and sold over the counter at most any drug or adult store. They work by temporarily numbing the area where the product is sprayed, therefore reducing sensitivity and, in turn, making it easier to stay in the game.
But there’s a lot of snake oil out there with sprays, creams and pills promising impossible results using ingredients and formulas that aren’t compliant with FDA standards. Very few options out there are actually tested against these strict strength, quality and purity standards, so make sure whatever you try is legally made with the government’s stamp of approval. Otherwise, who knows what’s in the random goo you’re spraying on your most sensitive appendage?
We recommend using only legal FDA-compliant delay sprays like Dynamo Delay, a new potent male desensitizer spray made in the USA using a concentrated 13% lidocaine formula, which means you can improve stamina, increase endurance and prolong pleasure with just a few sprays and barely any extra effort. It takes time to test it out and see how many sprays work best for you (some guys need two while others need up to 10) so, like the start-and-stop technique, try this by yourself before introducing it to a partner.
Uggghhh, we know. Communication seems to be the answer for all things sex- and relationship-related with every sexpert on the planet promoting the benefits of talking about our feelings. And while it may seem played out, there’s a reason why improved communication is a popular prescription.
Many experts consider premature ejaculation to be primarily a psychological issue associated with nervousness, stress and anxiety. And the concern you might feel leading up to a sexual encounter only compounds the problem. Doctors suggest taking some of the pressure off of yourself – and your performance – by letting your partner know what you’re feeling. Chances are not only will you feel less tension and fear about your orgasmic abilities, you’ll also spark a new level of connection with your partner. Showing your vulnerable side is a fast-track to intimacy – which can also lead to even better sex!
4) Kegel Exercise (It’s Not Just for Vaginas!)
Multiple studies have proven that regular strengthening of the pelvic floor muscles can give men greater control over their ejaculatory reflexes. Most recently, a 2014 study published in the Therapeutic Advances of Urology journal showed that 12 weeks of regular pelvic floor muscle rehabilitation led to impressive improvement in more than 80% of test subjects. That means squeezing and releasing the muscles that stop you from peeing (aka the PC or pubococcygeus muscles) can also help you last longer in bed!
Experts suggest handling your kegel exercises like you would any other workout (your bi’s and tri’s aren’t the only muscles in need of regular attention!). Clench and hold your PC muscles for 10 seconds, then release, and repeat. Try three sets of 10 reps every day and see how much better your orgasmic control can get!